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The Dating Optimist

Paul the Optimist

Challenging tired dating myths one graph at a time—and giving you an edge in San Francisco’s weird and competitive dating market

Platform
Substack
PricingOnly free issuesPublishesWeekly
Issues13SubscribersRead thedatingoptimist.substack.com

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Latest Issues

Recent posts by this newsletter. Browse the email archive.

Recovering the Shared Script of Dating (The Pipeline 4)

Your dating pipeline is going strong. You are around the right men, they are choosing you, and you are choosing them. Now comes the fun part: actually going on a date!

7 days ago
28
17

He's Choosing You, But You Are Not Choosing Him (The Pipeline 3)

Now we arrive at the final leak in your dating pipeline. You are in the right places. You act attractive, approachable, and eligible men are coming up to you in droves. Or maybe you are on Hinge and cannot get a break from all the DMs.

21 days ago
17
6

You’re Around The Right Men, But They're Not Choosing You (The Pipeline Part 2)

In Part 1, we explored the Pipeline approach to dating. We even covered the first leak in the pipeline: maybe you are simply not around the men you want. Maybe your routine, your hobbies, your social spaces, or even your Hinge setup are qui...

a month ago
5
0

Why Are My Hinge and Phone Full of Misfits? (The Pipeline, Part 1)

It’s hard to date if you’re an attractive woman in a big city. Your Hinge feed is full of likes, but they are not from the guys you feel a connection with. Chats that seemed promising fizzle out. Maybe they do not put in effort or maybe you...

a month ago
15
2

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Authors

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  • Paul the Optimist

    Fostering human connections through empathy, data, and optimism.

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