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Available for Parties

Alex Howe

The value of a party is unpredictability. \ud83c\udf86

Platform
Substack
PricingFreemiumPublishesWeekly
Issues62Founded4 years agoLast Issue5 days ago
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Latest Issues

Abbie Hoffman's stars and stripes

Until the insanity with Greenland of late, I knew nothing1 of Danish–American relations.2

I knew British-American relations were close enough to merit cute shorthand: in the biz, they call it The Special Relationship.

I would’ve told you...

5 days ago
2
1

Sheltered

The other really funny thing at the homeless shelter went like this.

It started with a dispute about turning off the lights.

Everyone sleeps in large rooms. It has this advantage over hostels in Newark: no bunk beds.

Atlantic Armory men’...

12 days ago
11

40 days, 40 nights

The funniest thing about the homeless shelter is the sign above the door that says NO TRESPASSING.

If you secretly have a HOUSE, stay OUT.

The second funniest thing about the homeless shelter is Nothing. (Lol.)

Actually that’s not true....

19 days ago
11
1

If we're shooting people, shoot me next

I need your help.

I need to get in touch with Fox News personality Jesse Watters.

I would like to invite him to consensually fight me at a time and place of his choosing.

Available for Parties is a reader-supported publication. To receiv...

8 months ago
5
1

Pandemic montage interlude

When Gilgamesh heard this.
he looked at Enkidu and laughed:
”Look, my friend, how scared I am,
I am so scared I will not go! Bah!”

— Gilgamesh, trans. Sophus Helle


Fall 2020.

Williamsburg, Brooklyn.

The CEO of m...

a year ago
8

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  • Alex Howe

    what if Girls but boy

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