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British's Substack

British Chaos

My personal Substack

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PricingFreemiumPublishesWeekly
Issues7Founded7 months agoLast Issue6 months ago
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Latest Issues

The Observation Ward

“Well, first they took my large intestine out,” said Bob, gazing out of the thick, airless windows overlooking Westminster Bridge and South Bank. “Then, my duodenum collapsed. And after all that, I got that bleedin’ MRSA bug that’s been goi...

6 months ago
100
5

Chaos Merchants #1 - Dilan Kurt

“If the people of Ilford could ask God one question, what would it be?” demands the young man with the microphone.

“Why I am still single?” bemoans a man in a tight white shirt outside Kansas Chicken & Pizza. “Just give me money, innit,” a...

6 months ago
26

Whatever Happened to The Carewave?

How Britain Fell out of Love with Schmaltzy Altruism

In the spring of 2021, I was in a pub in North Cornwall, working my way through a dreadful carvery lunch. By that point, the people of Britain had largely gotten over lockdown mania and...

7 months ago
18
Paid

The Time Was Never Right

The following was meant to be the introductory chapter to a book, entitled ‘The Time Was Never Right’ - a kind of pseudo-memoir about failing to come of age in the 2010s.

However, the response was so bad it was described as “completely un...

7 months ago
39
13

Acid Patriotism

I was sliding across the floor of Waterloo Station when I saw him: the most fucked man I have ever seen. It was a Saturday lunchtime in early September, the rain was whipping through the grand Victorian entrances, and we collided on the con...

7 months ago
148

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  • British Chaos

    Memories, dispatches and nightmares from a rapidly eroding island.

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