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The Canonical

Kyle Duggan

News from stories.

Platform
Substack
PricingOnly free issuesPublishesDaily
Issues62SubscribersRead thecanonical.net

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Latest Issues

Recent posts by this newsletter. Browse the email archive.

Blathers Accused of Displaying Stolen Cultural Relics

ANIMAL VILLAGE — Blathers, curator of a satellite branch of the Farway Museum, was accused of exhibiting items that had been improperly procured, sources confirmed.

a month ago
2
0

Editorial: I Asked GamemasterAnthony to Plan My Birthday and It Was a Disaster

It’s my birthday today, and I’m 35. That could mean a lot of things: that I can run for president, that I’m aging out of an important marketing demographic, or that I’m old enough for my baseline anxiety to qualify as a mid-life crisis. All...

a month ago
1
0

Next Generation of Westerosi Nobles Postponing Marriage After Series of Horrific Weddings

KING’S LANDING — Social commentators expressed concern for the future of the Seven Kingdoms after a new report showed that the children of Westerosi gentry were choosing to delay or forgo marriage after a series of violent weddings earlier ...

a month ago
1
0

Charlotte Replaced With AI

ZUCKERMAN FARM — A local spider who regularly integrated descriptive text regarding a nearby pig into her web designs has been laid off in favor of generative artificial intelligence, sources confirm.

a month ago
3
0

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Authors

The writers behind this newsletter.

  • Kyle Duggan

    Comedy writer and performer currently living outside of Providence, RI.

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