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The Oncology Underground

Hans Casteels

Welcome to Dispatch from the Oncology Underground. Prostate cancer, medical absurdity, and the slow-motion collapse of dignity, served with a side of dark humour and the occasional tofu recipe.

Platform
Substack
PricingOnly free issuesPublishesDaily
Issues447SubscribersRead nutmegphantasy.substack.com

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Latest Issues

Recent posts by this newsletter. Browse the email archive.

Chapter 1. The PSA Debacle. Your PSA Is High. Now What? Your Game Theory Based Decision Tree

Before anything else, let’s get one useless burden off your shoulders: this is not your fault. Cancer is not a moral accounting system where dessert gets tallied and cigarettes get audited with perfect fairness. People who treat sugar like ...

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15 Years Working For A French Company. A Report From Headquarters.

Working with the French is one of those experiences that quietly rearranges your understanding of how work is supposed to function, and if you think I am exaggerating, you have not yet sat through a meeting where lunch is treated as a non n...

5 days ago
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Elastic Waistbands and Other Signs of Courage

In the not so distant land of my once manly existence, somewhere between my fourth identity crisis and the moment my metabolism announced its retirement with full benefits, I found myself wandering the aisles of a department store. My missi...

7 days ago
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British Beef Week Nearly Ended My Marriage

This morning began, as many modern cautionary tales do, with an email that should never have been opened by a man with a credit card and a history of poor decision making dressed up as romance. The sender was a company called House of Bruar...

9 days ago
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Authors

The writers behind this newsletter.

  • Hans Casteels

    Survived cancer, marriage, and the healthcare system. Barely. Now I write about life’s side effects: insomnia, irony, and misplaced optimism. It’s not inspirational; it’s just what happens when sarcasm outlives shame.

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