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Issues37Foundeda year agoLast Issue21 days ago
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Latest Issues

DESIRES UNSUITABLE for MODERN ROMANCE, or

Ash Ketchum was not a man renowned for his penis. Though he was considered a best-in-class pokemon trainer, and the exploits in his teenage years were still the stuff of legend, he had one persistent problem.

“It’s okay,” says Misty, her e...

21 days ago
10
1

Doing a Lobotomite Run

You shouldn’t use TikTok.

One of the only things separating you from the animals is your ability to choose what you pay attention to. If you’ve ever tried to train a dog, you’ll know; they’re so distractible!

In fairness, evolutionarily...

6 months ago
4

I Mechanical-Turk'd a Sex Machine

(Editor’s Note: This is from my past. I’m somewhat less of a douche now.)

Her name was Nora.

Our best dates happened in a strip club, because then I could confuse my environmental arousal for enjoying her company. She was surrounded at al...

6 months ago
8
1

We could make Security Camera Gargoyles

Gargoyles are cool. Gargoyles made cities more classy. Now we have security cameras, which are dumb oppressive ball-and-stick gadgets.

What if we could beautify our cities with gargoyles?

www.UrbanGrotesque.com ?

(I own the domain but i...

6 months ago
2

A Guided Water Meditation

It’s time to relax. Time to surrender all thought, and let your mind take a break. Start by getting comfortable. You may want to sit or lie down...adjusting your robes and getting into a position where you can feel grounded, begin to settle...

6 months ago
2

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