Spoonie Times
Margo BensonSatire news for the chronically ill
| Platform |  | Pricing | Only free issues | Publishes | Weekly |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Issues | 71 | Founded | 3 years ago | Last Issue | a year ago |
| Active | |||||
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thespoonietimes.substack.comLatest Issues
Spoonie Introverts Rejoice: Mosquitoes Help Justify Avoiding Outdoor Events
Spoonie introverts across the nation are celebrating an unexpected ally in their ongoing quest to never leave the house: mosquitoes.
Yes, the bloodthirsty insects that once simply made outdoor events itchy and annoying have now become a me...
Hot Girl Summer? More Like Horizontal-Girl Summer
As the world collectively thaws from another emotionally traumatic winter and prepares for its annual descent into sunscreen-stained chaos, influencers everywhere are shouting about Hot Girl Summer. You know the type: abs, Aperol, and absol...
Summer Fashion for Spoonies: How to Rock a Compression Sock and Ice Pack Combo
As temperatures rise and able-bodied people prance around in sundresses and flip-flops, spoonies everywhere are left wondering: Can I wear a cooling vest to brunch without looking like I’m about to enter a cryogenic chamber?
Fear not, chro...
Hydrate or Die-drate: The Spoonie Guide to Lugging a 64oz Water Bottle Everywhere
Let’s be honest: there are two types of spoonies in this world—those who own a comically large, 64-ounce motivational water bottle with hourly affirmations like “You’ve Got This!” and “Don’t Give Up!”… and those who are chronically dehydrat...
Breaking: Insurance Denies Claim on the Grounds That "You’re Still Alive, Aren’t You?"
In a new low for the American healthcare system, local spoonie Marissa Kellerman’s insurance company, Hindenburg Health™, has officially denied her critical care claim with the now-viral justification: "You’re still alive, aren’t you?"
Kel...
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The writers behind this newsletter.
I'm a satire writer with a chronic illness and a dark sense of humor!
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