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The Crank

The Crank

The Crank combines the caustic cultural analysis of an embittered know-it-all with a penchant for plastic hair

Platform
Substack
PricingOnly free issuesPublishesWeekly
Issues16SubscribersRead thecrank.substack.com

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Latest Issues

Recent posts by this newsletter. Browse the email archive.

Why do gay people love Pokémon so much? The same reason everyone does.

The Crank is your go-to destination for watered-down thinkpieces that are easy enough to regurgitate to make your friends’ cooler friends think you’re not a cultural troglodyte. Rather than chasing the latest trends (you will never see me r...

3 months ago
5
12

Minecraft's magic is how ugly it looks and I wouldn't change that for the world

The Crank is your go-to destination for watered-down thinkpieces that are easy enough to regurgitate to make your friends’ cooler friends think you’re not a cultural troglodyte. Rather than chasing the latest trends (you will never see me r...

3 months ago
3
3

The two worst words in the English language are "immersive" and "experience"

The Crank is your go-to destination for watered-down thinkpieces that are easy enough to regurgitate to make your friends’ cooler friends think you’re not a cultural troglodyte. Rather than chasing the latest trends (you will never see me r...

4 months ago
4
5

More than revenge but just as gory: if you want a comeback, take notes from Lily Allen

The Crank is your go-to destination for watered-down thinkpieces that are easy enough to regurgitate to make your friends’ cooler friends think you’re not a cultural troglodyte. Rather than chasing the latest trends (you will never see me r...

4 months ago
4
5

Authors

The writers behind this newsletter.

  • The Crank

    When the world turns to unhelpful slop, turn to The Crank - the only niche online publication that combines fake hair with caustic cultural analysis. Originality is dead - and you need a washed-up drag hag to tell you exactly how to think.

  • Frequently Asked Questions

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