The Crumpet
The CrumpetSatire highlighting the funny, absurd and surreal sides of modern Britain. Still more accurate than the BBC.
| Platform |  | Pricing | Only free issues | Publishes | Daily |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Issues | 3 | Subscribers | Read | thecrumpet.co.uk |
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Latest Issues
Recent posts by this newsletter. Browse the email archive.
Britain to Adopt 39 New National Languages - Speaking English Now Considered Microaggression
WHITEHALL - The government has confirmed that English will now be one of 40 equally valid national languages used across Britain, in what ministers have described as “a bold step toward meaningful inclusivity, administrative complexity, and...
🚨 Police Log Non-Crime Hate Incident Against Itself After Reading Its Own Tweets
LONDON - In a stunning act of introspective policing, officers from the Metropolitan Police have officially recorded a Non-Crime Hate Incident (NCHI) against their own force after discovering that one of their historic tweets may have conta...
💼 Attorney General Rules Entire United Kingdom “Technically Illegal”; Sovereignty Leased to Mauritius, Then to French Seal Colony
LONDON \- In a surprise announcement that has thrown the nation into constitutional chaos, the Attorney General, Richard Hermer, has ruled that the entire United Kingdom, including England, Scotland, Wales, and the concept of “Britain” itse...
Authors
The writers behind this newsletter.
Britain's most trustworthy source for unreliable news.
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