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Thresholds. Life in the After.

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Latest Issues

That Kind of Love

It was the fall of 2021, and life was starting to feel normal again. We’d been vaccinated. David had been gone for two years. We’d lived in my childhood home for almost as long, with my parents right next door.

The house was a combination...

6 months ago
8
5

Whistles and that Chicago Might

My daughter wasn’t ready for school yet. I walked by her closed door, reminded her it’s time to go and took my coffee to the living room. I opened Signal and scrolled down hundreds of messages to get current.

The latest thing posted that...

7 months ago
11

Knots and Stones

Breathe into knuckles and jaw bones

Burn the knots

Witness the mess

The bumpers, barriers and blocks

Lay down in the river

Lay down in the mud

Let it soften you, break you

Catch on branches and curl around stones

Find the deep down...

8 months ago
3

Slide off, wings spread.

Part One. Push.

Ceci and I stopped into a playground after band practice this week. She was the oldest by at least five years. Everything was too small for her. The monkey bars too easy, the slide too short.

Lately she says things like...

9 months ago
3
1

Grand Gestures & Disappearances

When she was smaller she’d sometimes say, “I wish Daddy was still alive because everything would be okay then.” I wonder if it would be.

Nah, I don’t wonder. I know it wouldn’t be. Or I can place a safe bet.

“If I had two parents then…”...

10 months ago
7

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  • Carrie Ford Hilliker

    Designer and brand strategist. Making sense of a decade that changed everything. Always buy the mystery bag at the candy store.

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