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We're Gonna Get Those Bastards

Jared Dillian

Everything that is depraved, especially finance, culture, music and sex.

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Substack
PricingOnly free issuesPublishesTwice weekly
Issues306Founded5 years agoLast Issue6 days ago
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Latest Issues

No Drama

This was about eight or nine years ago. I was on a flight from somewhere to somewhere, and the flight attendants were doing their thing with the oxygen masks, and I was sitting there with my seat belt fastened, and a male flight attendant c...

6 days ago
50
13

Captain Obvious

My brother (who I write about from time to time) has been a big supporter on my weight loss journey. So the other day he sends me a video from Mel Robbins where she is extolling the virtues of exercise. She says that it makes you feel bette...

12 days ago
69
19

Live with Paul Ollinger

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13 days ago
20
1

Terminal Uniqueness

Say you have a problem. Your wife cheated on you. Actually, say you have several problems. Your wife cheated on you, you have gambling debts, your kid got arrested for shoplifting, you’re getting a tax audit, and you have back pain. You pro...

18 days ago
58
13

You Only Have One Penis

In the summer of 1988, I was in gifted and talented camp. I had a girlfriend. I wanted more girlfriends. I spent the entire three weeks either chasing girls, making out, or engaged in heavy petting. I was 14 years old—the kids don’t do this...

24 days ago
83
14

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  • Jared Dillian

    Writer, investor, electronic music curator. Dad to 7 wonderful cats.

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