Notes On Not Screaming
Dena HarrisHumor is how I make sense of daily life and survive adulthood without resorting to thumb-sucking in public. Hear that, airport boarding groups? I’m coming for you…
| Platform |  | Pricing | Only free issues | Publishes | Daily |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Issues | 9 | Founded | a month ago | Last Issue | 12 hours ago |
| Active | |||||
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notesonnotscreaming.substack.comLatest Issues
Clean Up on Aisle Four, Bitch
Photo by Vagaro on Unsplash
I’m not a spa-day person. Pedicures and massages rank only slightly above dental appointments on my list of preferred ways to spend an afternoon. But every so often, I have a brief, misguided “Because I’m worth...
She Can Barely Get Into My Car, but Sure, Let’s Try a Treadmill
Photo by Alex Tyson on Unsplash
“Mrs. D—— told me there’s a treadmill on the second floor,” my mother announces as she lowers herself into my car.
We are going to lunch. She pauses to catch her breath, then reaches for the seat belt.
“It...
Please Tell My Mother She's Pretty
Photo by Jamie Street on Unsplash
My mother recently got her hair cut.
Her hair is short and funky, white in the front and black in the back. With her oversized Harry Potter glasses, she looks as though she should be standing in front of...
The One Where My Mother Asked for a Vibrator
Photo by IFONNX Toys on Unsplash
My mom asked if I would buy her a vibrator.
To clarify, my 83-year-old, lives-in-a-senior-living-home, hasn’t-voluntarily-left-her-room-in-over-a-month mother asked me to select and purchase a sex toy.
Fo...
Does Cognitive Decline Begin With Misplacing Cured Meat?
Photo by James Trenda on Unsplash
I’ve never told anyone what I’m about to share here.
Somewhat recently, I pulled a package of bacon out of the fridge and threw a couple of slices in the microwave (don’t judge me). I wrapped the remainde...
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Authors
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Dena Harris is a humor writer making sense of adulthood, caregiving, relationships, dogs, and other situations for which there should have been training.
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